Tag: arthritis

Busy Month

We’ve had quite a busy month!  And still plenty more to go in the month!  We had a busy Mother’s Day weekend, complete with a day trip.  We thought it would be a fun outing but it turned out to be a royal pain instead.  We had our son’s yearly testing [he did really well].  We also have our yearly homeschool conference coming up later in the month as well.  I’m really excited because I have a few ideas on things to add for next year and what I want to buy.

 

I suspect I’ve also been somewhat quiet because of other reasons.  I doubt myself and what I post.  I don’t want to get too personal but I also want to express how I feel.  I’m raising my son in some ways very different than how I was raised.  I went to public school.  My parents were always very involved but they didn’t choose to homeschool until my youngest sister got to high school.  They also raised three girls.  I’ve got a very active little boy who thinks nothing like my sisters and I did.  I grew up in the city.  We live in a little country town.  And while it’s different, I still hear my mom or dad come through in what I say.

 

I’ve also been dealing with two medical issues.  First of all, I have arthritis.  I’ve had it since I was twelve years old as I mentioned in a previous post.  It’s being kept in check right now but I’m tired most of the time and high activity days can wreck me pretty badly for a day or two after the fact.  I’ve missed a lot more church than I like between the arthritis and the side effects of some of the medicines I’m on.

 

Second, and I don’t believe I’ve talked about this before, is that we’re trying to conceive again.  We’ve been trying for a while in fact [years] but I’m on medicine the last few months to try and help that along.  That’s made the last few months something of an emotional roller coaster and one I’ve been reluctant to share and talk about.  We’re trying to trust God, something that seems to come much easier to my husband than I.  We feel like we’ve been led here but at the same time trying to trust his timing.

 

Speaking of emotional roller coasters… well they make it hard to write.  My primary outlet of creativity is writing, so it calms me down, helps me work out problems, even if it is fictional characters I’m writing about.  Not being able to write makes me more wound up and it’s a nasty cycle that I occasionally will fall into.  Which is probably why this post is going to come across as disjointed and a little scattered.

 

In breaking the cycle, I have to start somewhere and this is it 🙂   I also have to stop trying to be perfect in what I do, because I’m not and never will be.  I had a reminder today that my son has those same tendencies… that if he can’t do something perfectly the first time, he doesn’t want to do it.  I have to overcome that and I have to try to just be me, not some idealized perfect version who doesn’t really exist.

 

Hope you enjoyed 🙂

My Yearly Goals and Where I’m At

Back in December I sat thinking about my goals for the next year.  Most people call them resolutions.  I always hated that because I always felt required to make the resolutions I thought everyone else wanted me to make.  And I never kept them, because I never wanted to nor really intended to.

In reading Dave Ramsey’s book Entre-Leadership, he said very explicitly in there that if you want to keep your goals – write them down.  Otherwise you won’t keep them.  I’ve never been one to write my goals down but I can attest – you will be much more motivated and on point if you do.

And truthfully guys, they are for you, not everyone else.  You can give your friends the cliche ones if you must because I think everyone claims to want to eat more vegetables.  but consider making a list for yourself.  I typed my list on my laptop in December while sitting at my parents’ house.  I didn’t show it to them or my husband or my son.  Now I did very soon after share the list with my husband but starting it was my initiative and it was things I wanted to accomplish, not things I thought I should want to accomplish.

Where am I with those?  Mostly on target.  I wanted to read my devotional every day and while I’m caught up, every day has turned into every other day or every third day at times.  I’m trying to get better about that but I missed out on half the year last year and I really want to finish the devotional I’m reading.

I want to read 50 books.  I’m ahead on that at this point [yes I’m counting books I read to my son because they do count!].  Goodreads has a yearly reading challenge and I signed up for that.  I’m at 17 completed so far so I may end up upping the goal at some point.

I have a goal to write 200,000 words during the year.  I’ve discovered that even attempting NaNoWriMo is just a stressful thing.  It’s 50,000 words in one month and add to that – it’s November.  Thanksgiving is a big holiday in hubby’s family so we end up spending a lot of the month getting ready for that and starting to get ready for Christmas so I’ve already got a busier schedule than usual.  Another reason I can’t do NaNo is that November and December I often write little to nothing just due to lack of inspiration/aforementioned busy schedule.  Trying to find time to do NaNo is just unrealistic.  Instead I sign up for another challenge called Get Your Words Out.  Their signups are sadly closed until the lead up to next year but I highly recommend it if you want to do a yearly writing goal instead.  I’m finding it much less stressful and I’m even ahead on the count.  My blog counts of course, but I’m also writing stories and the like.

I’ve added blogging to the list of yearly goals.  I want to update my gaming blog at least once a month and this blog at least once a week.  Clearly I’m a bit ahead on that schedule but writing is my outlet.  The time to be worried is when I can’t write, not when I write more than expected.

And exercise is back on the table as well.  My arthritis is under a lot better control and exercise will only help.  I’m starting slow but I’m trying to exercise almost every day.  If I go out running errands, I’m skipping that day but that’s simply to prevent me from overdoing.  I overdid a couple years ago and ended up pulling a muscle cluster in my back.  Let’s just say I never want to go there again.  Ever.  Even after just a week of keeping the schedule, I’m feeling better.  Fatigue is still a constant friend but it’s becoming a different kind of fatigue.  If the weather will ever stabilize, I think I’ll only advance faster.  The wild temperature swings are not pleasant in any way.  I don’t think we had but a week of real winter this go around.

Declutter 365/Home Storage Solutions is another thing we’re doing, but more casually.  Although we’re not keeping up on the day to day, we’re trying to get things done using the calendar.  I pick and choose what I can do during the week and then tackle harder things with hubby on the weekend.

Anyway, thanks for reading my rambles 🙂

 

Yes Indeed it Was

Vociferous was my word for the day yesterday.  Yes, indeedy.  I have no idea why but I ended up using it in a story I was writing and it just occurred to me how excellent a word it was.  I have no idea why that happened but hey, why not?  I used it in a conversation in real life as well so three uses in one day!

We did a lot of cleaning around the house today.  We caught up the laundry and dishes that had fallen behind when I had a stomach bug earlier in the week.  By the way, just in case there was any doubt; stomach bugs are NOT fun.  I was absolutely miserable on Monday and not too much better on Tuesday.

My son turned on his mothering mode.  Which is very sweet but also weird.  He came to check on me every ten minutes or so when I had to go lay down.  He brought me a wet rag after I threw up and he checked my forehead once or twice to see if I had a fever.  His diagnosis was that I did indeed feel warm but he couldn’t be sure.  My husband confirmed that I did appear to have a slight fever after he got home.

My son also insisted on calling his Daddy after I threw up.  I had him bring the phone in the bedroom – no need to panic my husband [who was just leaving work as we called].  And hubby stopped at a gas station on the way home and brought me home a coca-cola – my guilty pleasure.  It’s better than chocolate to me and I love chocolate.  However, with trying to lose weight and live healthier and better, I’ve been trying to cut it back and/or out as much as possible but trust me, I was in no place to fight that battle that day.

Anyway, by the time my husband got home, I was back on my feet but I’d missed getting dinner on, so we ended up doing an easy night of sandwiches [one of our fallbacks for when life happens].  My stomach wasn’t right the rest of the day or the next really but by Wednesday I was back to normal and trying to get everything caught up – errands, housework and schoolwork.

That’s one of the reasons I love homeschooling – if I get sick, we can take the day off.  We often do schoolwork on the weekends – because it’s fun so we usually get more than the required days in a year.  It was a lifesaver when my arthritis flared up again – I could live with slow mornings and get to schoolwork in the afternoons.

I’ve had arthritis since I was twelve years old.  That’s an odd thing to hear as a child because at that point all you know is that it’s something that’s supposed to happen “to old people”.  It’s funny to me.  I never asked God why He did that to me or why He let it happen.  I always assumed there was a reason and compared to a lot of people, it’s not that big a deal right?  I mean there are people with life threatening conditions.  In fact, getting a name for what was wrong with me was a relief after a year of not knowing.  It’s something I live with and something I struggle with.  Some days it’s easy and some days not so much.  I had a morning the other week when I was easily up and moving on a cold morning and ready to leave the house early.  And then two days later, I couldn’t get moving and missed church as a result.

I saw someone on a blog reference that you have a certain number of spoons to spend [energy] and you have to learn how to spend them.  I’ve gotten into the bad habit of trying to get all the things done on Friday and Saturday and then having nothing left for Sunday.  It’s a balance I’m trying to find.  It’s not made easier that when I do find it, my ability increases, so then I do too much and I’m back where I started.

I really need to start trusting God more and worrying about everything less, including that.  And then when I do miss church, I’ve got to stop being frustrated with myself and feeling bad about it.